well, ive been here a day or two making myself a pain in everyones arse, so i figure mize well introduce myself. My name is Omar and yep, you guessed it, im an
addict. It all started when i was like 19ish and going to keg parties and livin it up in college -- my friends would just get smashed on saturday night and
then go on with life as usual on sunday morning, whereas me-- i was goin to the liquor store on sunday morning. It took me years to figure out how people can
drink one night and not wake up 'thirsty', and even now i think its because mainly, ive gotten older and addiction as youth starts fading somewhat,
addiction gets alot more painful.
I owe what success i have managed to secure for myself in spite of my addiction(s) to my upbringing, where my old man read me dostoyevsky and Kipling instead of jack in the beanstalk to put me to bed when i was young, and did things like make me pass a test on a book or short novel every week in order to get my allowance (and learn russian and do various other wierd brain-teasing puzzles, in addition to getting 90% on the word power section of readers digest among other crap)-- and my allowance was like 1/2 of what everyone elses was anyways because as far as my dad knew, ice cream still cost 10c and movies still cost a buck and a quarter. I grew up upper middle class id say, but i never got anything given to me- my buddies at ager 16 were gettin cars, either thier parents handmedowns or even new ones -- for my 16th i got a key to my parents office, and a paper with my new job description on it which was basically a file clerk, for $7/hr-- and it wasnt till a few hundred hours later that I got to get myself a car. how i grew into such a terrible alcoholic, i still cant totally figure out.
i managed to make it through college and lawschool and do fairly well though, in spite of a lingering problem with the bottle, and then instead of taking the normal road, i shined off the bar exam and became a professional gambler for a few years. This was when the addictions got the most out of control, and in the end, i crawled back to my parents, totally defeated by the liquor and the coke (lol@cocaine, looking back on it) -- sobered up long enough to pass the Bar Exam, and then eventually went back to drinkin ... then i met my GF who introduced me to crystal meth and that prertty much cured the drinking problem but started an entirely different one. Shes real nice and is a family friend, and her parents are real close family friends, and she's also a real bad addict. About a month ago or so, I decided to quit using the crank and told her she ought to also (obv she hasnt). About 2 weeks ago, her mom & dad call me up and ask me 'is my daughter using meth?' and in complete violation of our sacred agreement never to tell anyone we knew i said 'yes'. Theyre now going to alanon to try to figure how to deal with it, as she goes from real nice and sweet to having pretty much every sign of borderline personality disorder when she's using. And here i am today, house-sitting at her parents condo for the weekend, chillin and drinkin beers (and her hittin the crackpipe obv) and lighting illegal fireworks ..
Im a pretty nice guy, but i know bull- *%%% when i see it, and don't have a very high tolerance for it-- the program never got me totaly sober, (it helped though) but it did make me understand the idea of brutal self honesty -- i really dont care who or what anyone is, as i am pretty much very tolerant and udnerstanding of people and thier situations -- the only thing i really cant stand is people who arent honest about it all....
I owe what success i have managed to secure for myself in spite of my addiction(s) to my upbringing, where my old man read me dostoyevsky and Kipling instead of jack in the beanstalk to put me to bed when i was young, and did things like make me pass a test on a book or short novel every week in order to get my allowance (and learn russian and do various other wierd brain-teasing puzzles, in addition to getting 90% on the word power section of readers digest among other crap)-- and my allowance was like 1/2 of what everyone elses was anyways because as far as my dad knew, ice cream still cost 10c and movies still cost a buck and a quarter. I grew up upper middle class id say, but i never got anything given to me- my buddies at ager 16 were gettin cars, either thier parents handmedowns or even new ones -- for my 16th i got a key to my parents office, and a paper with my new job description on it which was basically a file clerk, for $7/hr-- and it wasnt till a few hundred hours later that I got to get myself a car. how i grew into such a terrible alcoholic, i still cant totally figure out.
i managed to make it through college and lawschool and do fairly well though, in spite of a lingering problem with the bottle, and then instead of taking the normal road, i shined off the bar exam and became a professional gambler for a few years. This was when the addictions got the most out of control, and in the end, i crawled back to my parents, totally defeated by the liquor and the coke (lol@cocaine, looking back on it) -- sobered up long enough to pass the Bar Exam, and then eventually went back to drinkin ... then i met my GF who introduced me to crystal meth and that prertty much cured the drinking problem but started an entirely different one. Shes real nice and is a family friend, and her parents are real close family friends, and she's also a real bad addict. About a month ago or so, I decided to quit using the crank and told her she ought to also (obv she hasnt). About 2 weeks ago, her mom & dad call me up and ask me 'is my daughter using meth?' and in complete violation of our sacred agreement never to tell anyone we knew i said 'yes'. Theyre now going to alanon to try to figure how to deal with it, as she goes from real nice and sweet to having pretty much every sign of borderline personality disorder when she's using. And here i am today, house-sitting at her parents condo for the weekend, chillin and drinkin beers (and her hittin the crackpipe obv) and lighting illegal fireworks ..
Im a pretty nice guy, but i know bull- *%%% when i see it, and don't have a very high tolerance for it-- the program never got me totaly sober, (it helped though) but it did make me understand the idea of brutal self honesty -- i really dont care who or what anyone is, as i am pretty much very tolerant and udnerstanding of people and thier situations -- the only thing i really cant stand is people who arent honest about it all....
just
play me a little big and rich and I'll be lost!
