update on my daughter..more drama

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Northapt	update on my daughter..more drama	Lead	[-]
Posts: 294 (07/02/09 17:27:04) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I'm still waiting for CPS to give me my granddaughter. She has been in shelter care for 3 weeks now. There is a law in Washington mandating they place a child with appropriate relatives before foster care. They have taken an attitude with me and I've had to hire a lawyer. We are filing a motion to intervene in the dependency. The lawyer says they are probably upset with me when I questioned them on considering placing the child back with my daughter within 30-days of her entering treatment. They apparently hate being questioned about their motives which seems to be litigation-based and not the best interest of the child. My daughter plans to go to a year-long inpatient in Seattle which is good but I don't see how she can possibly parent after only 30-days clean. She has been slamming for 12-plus years-as much dope as she can find. She is paranoid and delusional. I am a Chemical Dependency professional and this is my business. They hate that even more it seems. We'll see what happens in Court but I will not give up trying to help this child. Anyone have an opinion or any resources on parenting during PAWS? Thanks Ron
nanobanano		#1	[-]
Posts: 599 (07/02/09 17:59:37) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Northapt.............I wish I had some good advice, but my dealings with CPS here in Texas left my grandson in the hands of my ex-daughter-in-law and her molester boyfriend........because this happened during divorce proceedings, it was assumed that I had ulterior motives..........never mind that I'm a pediatric nurse who was caring for the child while his Mom worked. The smarter you are, the more threatened they feel, it seems to me. I'll pray for you and your grandchild.....also there are websites where you can get advice from others who have had dealings with CPS......and document EVERYTHING!! GOOD LUCK! NANO
Kathy as cmom		#2	[-]
Posts: 550 (07/02/09 18:43:09) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I was one of the lucky ones. I never had to hire an atty. The judge automatically gave me custody after a home inspection. Good luck! Kathy
danimal55		#3	[-]
Posts: 9300 (07/02/09 19:15:17) Forum Star Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	CPS loaths challenges to their motives and hyper-inflated sense of authority....not to mention calls for accountability for their blatant and illegal policy violations and abuse of authority. Ron, a look at what went down recently with Stevens/Ferry County CPS supports your sentiments in a big way. A total shakedown of the system followed an in depth investigation of numerous complaints. Several years ago here a close neighbor was gunned down in front of his entire family when CPS and a deputy sherrif showed up unannounced to illegally remove his 3 children, as tensions rose a gestapo-minded "Barney" emptied 9 rounds into the Father when he came unglued over what was happening. Ironically, the same Ferry County deputy was later fired over child molestation allegations. i.e take everything CPS says or does personally. The following links explain why in no uncertain terms. http://kidjacked.com/states.asp?st=Washington http://news.opb.org/article/4975-trouble-colville-wa-child-protective-services-crosshairs/ http://fightcps.com/search/social%20workers/ needless to say... It's only clear that M needs more than another repeat of a 30 day spin-dry. Last Edited By: danimal55 07/02/09 22:56:22. Edited 1 times.
phoenix		#4	[-]
Posts: 1862 (07/02/09 21:45:09) Forum Friend Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	"She is paranoid and delusional. I am a Chemical Dependency professional and this is my business." C'mon dude, your "business" is diagnosing chemical abuse and dependency and developing treatment plans as per the DSM and ASAM criteria.... Or, are you also a qualified LPC/PhD that can DX axis 1 & 3 disorders as well? Don't take the actions of CPS so personally, they are bound by FEDERAL laws as set forth in the Adoption and Safe Families Act (ASFA) that simultaneously requires CPS to work two plans for the child... One of which is reunification of the kid with her mom. I am sure that you are aware of all the studies out there that indicate the most successful treatment outcomes for women with children are programs that incorporate the child into the residential treatment environment with the mother. When mothers participate in treatment with their children they, stay in treatment longer, their clinical outcomes improve, their parenting skills improve, and most importantly.... The children experience developmental and behavioral benefits that make it the most ideal situation for them. You say, " I don't see how she can possibly parent after only 30-days clean." Well, that pretty much goes without saying... but that is where the Parenting Skills classes, the intensive group therapy that she will probably be doing every night and most importantly... All of the interaction with her daughter in a supervised, nurturing setting conducive to the emotional health of both of them. All this assumes that the mother is following a treatment plan and progressing...And don't forget, this is residential, your granddaughter will be supervised and receive the therapy that she might need as well. And if it doesn't work out for mum? Well that's where the "other" plan that CPS is also working on comes in... The one where they terminate your daughters parental rights if she can't get her act together in a year... You don't want that do you? To question the "motives" of an agency that deals with the welfare of children, like CPS, based upon a few isolated incidents is.... crazy. The reality is that agency's such as CPS are full of some of the most caring, honest, hard working and under paid people you will ever find... It's soooo easy to armchair quaterback those folks, but I think that those, and the agency's that they work for, who actually "do something" to help our most venerable population...Deserve our respect. PS... Where is the "drama"? Sounds like your daughter is doing what she needs to do. Last Edited By: phoenix 07/02/09 21:48:45. Edited 1 times.
Northapt		#5	[-]
Posts: 295 (07/02/09 23:02:38) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	As a CDP, I see meth psychosis all the time.Thats what was assessed and it goes without saying.. not by me. These "Caring professionals" told me "get a lawyer or give your money to charity for all the good it will do you." This past tuesday I was told I could have the child and to get day care lined up for while I was at work.. I dropped everything and did just that. 3-hrs later the same case worker called and told me "never mind." Her supervsior over-ruled her. What the hell? You just can;'t treat people like that.It's just cruel. A friend of mine who is a foster mom agreed to help if they won't give the child to me, was told she had to agree to adopt the child in a termination or the baby stays in the foster care system. When she refused, they found she was "not approprate" even though she runs a lisensed foster home. There are web sites set up for this CPS practice here in Washington- manipulating foster parents into adoptions. Washington law makers are calling for the system to be dismantled-it is so broken. Those of you on the board that know me know that this is the 2nd dependency for this baby. She was exposed to porn, dirty needles, left with random men while my daughter shoplifted and was locked in the bathroom while my daughter turned tricks. She has been through ENOUGH. She's only 3!! My daughter is a grown woman who ether wants recovery or she does not.This baby has no choice. There is no one in our family that doesn't use meth besides me. When she went to Isabella House here in Spokane for 6 months they wisely assessed her progress back then before allowing the baby to join her. It took 4 months. It was the careful, professional assessment of the referant that she will not be ready to parent in 30-days. CPS ignored her. She said they normally do. This baby has been through hell and I will advovate for her if no one else will. She has a statutory right to be placed with family. WAC 388-25-0445 requires that "the department must search for appropriate relatives to care for the child before considering nonrelative placements." I hate courts and lawyers and all that but it seems that I have no other options. I'd love to "just get along" but my grandaughter is with strangers right now. One of the complaints that kept coming into CSP was, she was always left with strangers.They won't work with me because they say they don't have to. 'Grand parents have no rights" they tell me. In my mind, this is not about my rights. it's about the child's rights.i'd love to just get along with them. We probably want the same thing when all is said and done. We could sure use everyones prayers. Last Edited By: Northapt 07/03/09 00:08:38. Edited 2 times.
abbey t of lv		#6	[-]
Posts: 393 (07/02/09 23:27:43) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Ron, You have my prayers. Lots of them.
Northapt		#7	[-]
Posts: 296 (07/02/09 23:54:47) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	For this who care to look. Yes, the system is broken.The dept seems to be primarly self-preserving. http://blogs.king5.com/archives/2008/12/behind-the-scen-2.html
jwl65	I'll pray for ya	#8	[-]
Posts: 41 (07/03/09 04:40:08) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I 'll pray for ya? it's stories like your's, that scare's the hell out of me? here in N. Alabama i have not heard of cps, it's DHR (dept of human resources) that get involved with abused children, and here, i have have heard, that when meth's involved, they take the children 100% of the time, if both parent's are using. i am not afraid of taking drug test, cause i am clean, but they still can get all in my business, and cause me aggrevation. lady came here, once about 3 or 4 week's ago and i was at work, asking for my soon to be x, she told my son, she would be back. i at first thought? it was a follow up to my wife's rehab, cause they do that here, but i was told by her counselor, yes they do that, but your wife was not in rehab because of dhr, she was court ordered, so it sound like an investigation to her? and since then, i have heard, that a jealous girlfriend, of the man my wife's is with probably, reported her, so now i am waiting for dhr to show up at anytime, the only thing i really worry about is if there is something hid in this house? i have look but hell you can hide that stuff anywhere. i apologize, ron, for gettin long winded on your post, but your story and other's worry me. i have been through enough already with her addiction, i damn sure do not want to go through legal b/s over my children. and i feel for you all, that i read, that has dealt with this. i will keep reading here, to see your progress, and hope all of it turn's out well for ya? i will keep you in my pray's and god bless.
danimal55		#9	[-]
Posts: 9302 (07/03/09 09:08:24) Forum Star Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	"The dept seems to be primarly self-preserving." Bingo! Power and control is the theme, and the the dis-placement of children is their bread and butter/job security, not unlike the privatization of the prison industry. I read the link you posted Ron, and the reader comments, the article and comments all say the same thing, CPS is self serving as well as self preserving, rotting from the inside out, and in many cases doing far more harm than good. Like most govenment agencies today.
Northapt		#10	[-]
Posts: 298 (07/04/09 15:53:32) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I'm particularly looking for information about a parents ability to parent while going through PAWS with Meth. I'm suspecting it takes more then 30-days.
Loraura		#11	[-]
Posts: 8974 (07/04/09 16:03:49) Moderator Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Some parents get clean without ever loosing their kids or have someone else care for them. They may not be model parents during those first weeks or months, but many managed not to harm their children during that time. It's possible. I'm not saying your daughter can or can't. Just that some other people can.
debbieL	Keep On!!!	#12	[-]
Posts: 8 (07/05/09 17:30:32) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Ron, Just stay with it, don't drop the ball, if you don't like the answer from your worker, go above her head. Keep working the phone, don't give up! You know all this I'm sure. Washington state has some screwy workers, and they are not all good. Some are, some aren't. Keep us posted. Wow. what the F???? Does it really need to be this hard?
Northapt		#13	[-]
Posts: 300 (07/05/09 18:34:11) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Debbie. I did go over her head and her supersior was a condesending ass. Thats why I have a lawyer now. I agree. It shouldn't be this hard.
nineyearsclean		#14	[-]
Posts: 9353 (07/06/09 09:00:28) Best Friend to KCI Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I am sure that you are aware of all the studies out there that indicate the most successful treatment outcomes for women with children are programs that incorporate the child into the residential treatment environment with the mother. When mothers participate in treatment with their children they, stay in treatment longer, their clinical outcomes improve, their parenting skills improve, and most importantly.... The children experience developmental and behavioral benefits that make it the most ideal situation for them. You say, " I don't see how she can possibly parent after only 30-days clean." Well, that pretty much goes without saying... but that is where the Parenting Skills classes, the intensive group therapy that she will probably be doing every night and most importantly... All of the interaction with her daughter in a supervised, nurturing setting conducive to the emotional health of both of them. All this assumes that the mother is following a treatment plan and progressing...And don't forget, this is residential, your granddaughter will be supervised and receive the therapy that she might need as well. Hey Phoenix - Ron's daughter AND her innocent child, who is the real victim here, have already been down this road. The Parenting Skills classes, the intensive group therapy, the residential treatment where both mother and child reside, blah blah blah blah blah blah BLAH!!!!! Been there....Done that! To question the "motives" of an agency that deals with the welfare of children, like CPS, based upon a few isolated incidents is.... crazy. No Phoenix, it is not crazy - in fact, it is quite the opposite. These incidents are not just "...a few...", nor are they "...isolated..." - not by any stretch of the imagination. Last Edited By: nineyearsclean 07/06/09 09:06:35. Edited 1 times.
debbieL	condescending ass	#15	[-]
Posts: 10 (07/06/09 12:57:34) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Stupid egotistical CPS workers...Sometimes they are such power-trippers. The lawyer is a good one I hope! Smart of you to do that, and I'm sure not cheap. Keep us posted! I'm sure you know this already, but remain calm when you are blasted with stupidity!
sickandtired77		#16	[-]
Posts: 887 (07/06/09 13:35:27) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Well... I'm in Oklahoma. I can tell you for certain that in my immediate area, CPS workers are a complete and utter joke. They are most concerned with doing what takes the LEAST amount of paperwork. Most of the social workers here are known barflies who call in sick AT LEAST once a week because they are just too hung over to function at work. I know this is a generalization, and may not be true for everywhere. But in my neck of the woods, the social workers tend to place themselves on such a high pedestal that they believe themselves untouchable. They assume that because they have a say in what is best for children, they can do no wrong. It's kind of like a God complex around here. It's sad and it's wrong... but I would certainly not be comfortable with just trusting whatever they come up with... Not around here anyway. Best of luck to you!