Tell Me That My Husband and I Did The Right Thing!!

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peg59	Tell Me That My Husband and I Did The Right Thing!!	Lead	[-]
Posts: 70 (04/29/08 19:16:39) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I posted the last week that our son got picked for non payment of fines. I suspect highly that he has been doing meth again. We did not pay the fines. He went berizk in court, got violation of probation, 2 assualt charges on police officers, and disordely conduct. I called today to see when the next court was. They are not taking him back to court Til June. I can't understand why they are waiting so long. They still have him in lockdown away from the other inmates. I ask how he was, cause they would not allow visitors last Sunday, the girl on the phone said he is doing better, but sometimes he goes off and kicks the wall and throws things and talks to himself. She asked if he had any medical problems. They have been wondering if he is just trying to act crazy to pull the wool over them. I told her no, he is not acting. He has ADHD and if he drinks or does any drugs he gets worse. She wanted to know if I had ever been told that he could be Bipolar. I said no, but definately ADHD by a physicarist. My husband and I have witnessed the talking to himself, you would swear that 2 or 3 people were in the same room talking to him, carrying on a conversation with him. He even gets mad at them, and then says ok I'm sorry. We are sitting here tonight any my Husband just said, this whole matter is weighing heavy on his heart, because he has caught more charges on him, knowing we could have got him out of jail, but he said his heart tells him to help him, but his head says he is doing the right thing by doing nothing. I pray to God, we have done the right thing. We have always known that he has ADHD, and that alone has gotten him into trouble without putting drugs and acoloh in the mix. Mixing all 3 together, and he is dangerous. Please tell us we are doing the right thing. Peg
luvepiphany		#1	[-]
Posts: 7421 (04/29/08 19:33:55) Forum Star Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Peg, I think I hear you feeling that you really have done the "right" thing this time. It sounds like you may have finally been able to do something to help him get some help. Meth psychosis can last for some time after the meth is out of the system-it did my addict x. In jail he threw fits etc. and got put in the "hole" or isolation and on suicide watch. I also had the jail notified but didn't speak to them personally. It's very common for meth addicts to throw miserable fits while detoxing. It's also common for people with mental disorders to act worse when detoxing from meth. Penelope works in a psych hospital and she has seen many a fit thrown by a meth addict in psychosis who may or may not have had other mental disorders. She hopefully will write a bit about it. Schizophrenia can look like meth psychosis and vice versa. It's often said that bipolar people cannot be thoroughly diagnosed for quite some time after quitting meth so the jail person was probably just trying to see if there were some meds that they could give him. It sounds like he might get some real help though...jail isn't the greatest for that but maybe it will be for him. You never know. Have Faith that he has a God that's watching over him and going to turn all of this to good. Hugs for you, I know it must be h3ll. But, remember, He Is Clean and it Is common for an addict to FREAK OUT when getting meth out of their system. Lots of people are praying for your son...people he has never met....and you too. luv
nineyearsclean		#2	[-]
Posts: 7515 (04/29/08 19:37:10) Best Friend to KCI Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	In my humble opinion, you are doing the right thing. I would ask, however, for a psych evaluation. If he is talking to people who aren't there physically, he could have other serious mental health issues that have not yet been diagnosed. It depends alot on how long he's been using, how heavily, how long since he's been clean, et cetera, et cetera. It is complicated, and it is very difficult to diagnose when you add drugs and alcohol to the mix. I would want to know that he is alright physically as well. Not to worry you, but I would want some objective opinion as to whether or not he has been mistreated there, given the fact that he is being held for assaulting officers. You have to remember, you didn't do this to him. He did. And as bad as you want to rescue him, my opinion is that that would be the worst thing you could do. The best thing you can do for yourself is have an objective opinion as to whether or not he is being treated humanely. After that, this is his gig. Let him pay the piper. Let him feel the full force of his actions. Don't blame yourselves. You had nothing to do with this. Bailing him out would have been a HUGE mistake. Please, take good care of each other. This isn't your fault. This is not your fault.
peg59	Tell Me That My Husband and I Did The Right Thing!!	#3	[-]
Posts: 71 (04/29/08 20:05:19) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I asked the girl that answered the phone, if he was beaten up, she said no, but it took 3 or 4 officers to contain him. I also asked in he was susidal, she said she did not think so. Of course I haven't seen or talked to him. They took away visitation, calling, and commissary rights away last week. I will call again on Friday to see if he can have visitors this week. Should I call the nurse and talk to her about him?? I know he needs some kind of meds for the adhd. They told me the crisis center was called to talk to him, but they said if the jail would keep him to where they could watch him, he would be alright in jail. I don't know what to do to get him a psyc evaluation in jail. He knows that he has adhd, the doctor talked to him about it, but that was a long time ago. He has not been back to see a doctor about that in a very long time, since he discovered pot, then drinking, then meth. He started using meth in Aug of last year. He went crazy then, hearing people, seeing people and paranoid. He seemed better from Jan til the first of this month, although not good. He would still get mad at us and has always talked to other people that were not there for months now. So I don't know how much he has used. We knew if they waited and watched him, that they would hear him talking to himself. It has been 2 weeks tomorrow since he went to jail. Maybe it is coming off the meth that is causing this anger.
peg59		#4	[-]
Posts: 72 (04/29/08 20:11:25) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Thank you both for your replys. And you will never know how much it helps us to talk to you. We don't feel like we have people around us that we can talk to. And thanks so much for your prayers. We really need them now. I keep thinking what my Grandmother used to say in hard times, sometimes you just have to stand still. It is really hard to do. Peg
nineyearsclean		#5	[-]
Posts: 7518 (04/29/08 20:11:28) Best Friend to KCI Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Oh, well then from my own experience I can tell you that he's probably experiencing meth psychosis. It will fade away the longer he is clean. He is suffering from withdrawals. And suffering is the best thing that can happen to him right now. I feel better about it now that you've given me more information. I'm not a professional, but I'm a former meth addict of 13 years, and I suffered from severe meth psychosis the last year or two of my 13 year addiction. I saw people who weren't there; I heard people who weren't there; and I'm pretty sure I talked to them too. Please. Take care of yourselves right now. This is probably the best place for him right now.
blueheart		#6	[-]
Posts: 344 (04/29/08 20:12:14) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I'm so sorry for you and your husband. I understand the strain on a parent's heart when realizing we can't fix this.... many of us do. Hun, you and your husband are doing the right thing. Do not bail him out. There are systems in place and at this point you need to put your faith in God, and trust the system. If you bail him out he'll be back running amuck and using. You couldn't control him before and you certainly won't be able to change him once he's outside. He needs to be locked up and be accountable for his errors. Be thankful he is safe (safer than on the streets) with a roof over his head and 3 meals a day. He needs to be locked up and have some time for his body to detox. I'm no expert on ADHD but I don't believe it causes hallucinations. I do know bipolar and hallucinations can be conditions caused by meth. Methworld leads to jail, institutions or death. Your son is in a place that might just get his attention. Let's pray and trust God he finds his way. Do what you can to inform the jail of your son's medical conditions. Call the jail chaplain and ask if he'll check on your son. Pray. Finally let go and let God. In the meantime you and your husband need to take good care of yourselves. Eat well, get your sleep, take walks.... breathe in, breathe out. Have your check-ups. Seek wise counsel thru your church and/or NA/AA meetings or a good drug counselor. Be prepared to hear the truth - which will be shocking and painful. But you can't be in denial about any of this anymore. Bailing him out is enabling him to continue to use. Peg I am encouraged for you. There is tremendous hope for your son, but you and your husband need to arm yourselves with the resources to help him when he is ready to hear you. If he's locked up for a while - that's a good thing. You and your husband have come to the right place. This is where I came 3 years ago when we found out our son was a meth addict. We were green peas - just like you.... didn't know a thing about the drug. Educate yourself. Ask questions. Read threads and testimonies here. Go into the chat room and ask questions and really listen to what people here have to say. Again Peg, for his sake - do not bail him out. After prison rehab, our son has been clean now for 1 year, 1 month and 1 day. Had we bailed him out the story would be much different. You guys are in my prayers.
peg59	Tell Me That My Husband and I Did The Right Thing!!	#7	[-]
Posts: 73 (04/29/08 20:21:56) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Thank you all for the encourgement. We really need it. My husband doesn't type on here, but I let him read what you have to say and it helps him. We had this boy later in our lives, a truly gift from God. It's heartbreaking at times, then I come here and feel better. Thank you all And God bless. It gives me hopes when I hear that you have been clean for years or months or even days. I am so proud of everyone of you. Peg
luvepiphany		#8	[-]
Posts: 7422 (04/29/08 20:58:34) Forum Star Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Peg, especially read motherglory's posts or pm her and ask her about her son and the way he acted... she changed her screen name after her son entered the Teen Challenge program in Florida(her son is in his 30's-they take men too). He is clean now for many months and when he was using, he acted like a complete crazy man and he is a completely different person now. or at least he is not experiencing any of the meth psychosis or craziness that he was. I think her story and testimony to her faith will comfort you and your husband. luv
forget suzette		#9	[-]
Posts: 13915 (04/29/08 21:34:17) Forum Star Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	..............it was out of your hands when He went berizk in court, got violation of probation, 2 assualt charges on police officers, and disordely conduct. .....what COULD you do? He acted on his own. ...I'm ADHD, I was detoxing many times.....would I hit a cop??? ...NO. I would'nt hit anyone, .........but, as crazy as I am.... I know .........HITTING THE POLICE IS BAD. and doing it on their turf?? in a nest of them hopped up on donuts and coffee? ........with all those eyes on you? this is your son, and I don't wanna offend you.....but, he might be in need of maximun security. ......while he's in there...they'll find out pretty quick if his cell should be padded. Last Edited By: forget suzette 04/29/08 21:41:13. Edited 1 times.
forget suzette		#10	[-]
Posts: 13916 (04/29/08 21:45:10) Forum Star Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	...I'm so sorry you are going thru this. reallly. light surround you and protect you.

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