I read people from time to time, posting about how they've tried to quit and not been able to...
They'll list all the things they've tried that haven't worked...
And I find myself wanting to share the following:
I did end up quitting.
I did it largely through the structure of AA (Not NA).
And it took me several years of going and failing and going and failing.
SO THEN SHOULD I SAY AA "WORKED"?
Well, it didn't work the first dozen times, if you judge it by the fact I relapsed.
Then again did I REALLY do all 12 steps, no, but that's another story...
AA "didn't work" for me at all. For a lot of times.
Then it did.
Does that mean "it worked?"
MY POINT IS
Quitting Meth isn't a one-shot deal. There's no reason to assume just because one method didn't work before it might not work now...
THE ONLY THING ABOUT QUITTING
Is you are either trying or you're not. You can judge this based only on your actions. How you feel about them is immaterial.
If you are trying, then you'll keep trying and trying and one day it will happen.
You'll keep trying new methods, then go back and retry old ones that failed, you won't give up.
And if you're not really trying, then you will make a list of stuff that didn't work and never give those ways another try.
THERE ARE NO BONUS POINTS
For which method you use. Or how many times it takes.
DON'T GIVE UP
It can be frustrating, it can be trying, it can be so hard to keep going back and trying again.
DON'T GIVE UP
When you hear your mind telling you "that didn't work and it never will" -- that's addiction talking.
I KNOW
Because it said that to me. And honestly, it was dumb luck, laziness, and fear of being branded a quitter that kept me trying the same old methods over and over again...
...well thank god I did.
Because on the umpteenth time I tried something I knew wouldn't work... It actually did.
And sitting here right now, the fact that "it failed me" a zillion times before it worked -- doesn't matter to me at all.
What matters is -- it did work. Eventually.
Happy New Year/New Life
t
