So. When I do speed, I masturbate. A lot. A lot.
I won't spend a whole day pleasuring myself... I set aside two or three days to really get the job done, and I won't stop until my equipment is simply unable to rise to the challenge. That's no pun, since I will have stopped being able to get a proper erection 3 or 4 orgasms before it simply becomes impossible for my body to rise to the challenge of producing another climax.
If jerking off became an Olympic sport they would immediately place a moratorium on all competition until I passed away. There just wouldn't be any point.
Now, I want to be careful to not over-do the details, but suffice to say I have everything down to an exact science. The right chair, the right lube, the right porn, the right strain of weed and the right brand of cigarettes.
I always lose count, since by the end I've been sleepless for however many days, but I'd say a conservative estimate for a full cycle would be 15-20 "home runs". I only take breaks for food 'n stuff, and to let me libido recharge. Doesn't take long. I don't know if it's because I do really good %*#+, or because of my naturally high level of sexual energy, but not 15 minutes goes by until I'm rearing to go again. Sometimes it will take hours to finish off, and over time, with the sleep dep and weed, I get into a space. It's a cocoon of fuzzy warmth that's gentle and relaxing. And when those mild psychedelic-type effects start fading in, well, that's just a real fun place to be. I have quality porn. Not quality of the Jenna Jamison style. Vids that feel natural, believable... organic. I have hundreds of gigs covering various genres, so I'm covered no matter my particular proclivities that day.
And there I exist, doing my thing, in my cocoon of peace and pleasure.
In fact, it was my onanist compulsion that made me give up crystal meth. Needless to say, it would take a good week or so before I had any chance of putting in even a mediocre performance with my girlfriend, and the reduced level of that sensual, visceral energy that binds two carnal humans together began to take an emotional toll. It's the damnedest thing. Without the masturbation angle, I would probably still be doing speed. I did it for many, many years and while naturally a bad thing would sometimes happen as a result of over-indulgence, it never took over like it seems to with some people -- most people, if this forum is representative.
Yet sober I seldom masturbate. My incredible girlfriend is partly responsible for that, but even when younger it was never a regular thing. I find it quite amusing in the final analysis that while addicted to meth I developed an addiction to masturbation that in turn brought about the end of the meth addiction, that in turn solved the masturbation issue. Like a co-dependency hit an inter-dependency and they canceled each other out. Heh.
So I said all that to say this: anyone else? Don't worry, I won't look down on you if you haven't taken it to the level I attained. Don't be intimidated. Seriously, though. Because I would hook up, smoke a little with my boy, and then I couldn't WAIT to get home and get started. Anyone else have have long, long sessions? Because I can't believe I was the only one. I am a normal, well-balance person with a fulfilling sex life, pretty vanilla, no weird %*#+ at all in that or any area.
Talk to me. I'm really curious. Share, or question, whatever. It was a pretty fascinating period of my life, and some aspects of it I look back on fondly.
Now. I realize this is a personal thing, and many of you are part of a community here and may not be able to be completely frank and share as freely as you might want to, so this is the idea I came up with to allow everyone who wants to to post anonymously: send your post to me either here or at [email protected], and I will post it for you. You can include a pseudonym for the purpose of being identifiable in a discussion, or go nameless. If you just want to converse with me only I of course welcome that as well. For better anonymity I suggest posting to the gmx.com account, that way there's no chance of anyone snooping through our correspondence on this system.
I'll post the messages (if there are any) at least once a day, probably more. I should mention too, that my connection to this web site is untraceable. Yeah, sounds like I went through a little too much effort here, but I simply enjoy frank, honest conversation, and this is the best method I could think of to help facilitate that. Of course, if people could post anonymously, that would be the best scenario, but from what I understand that's not possible here. (If it is, speak up! Sure would make things easier on me!