I came to realize that I can't alter my mind with anything because I will wake up
my addictive thinking and loose the control I have over it with my Rational thinking.
Alcohol has proven to me to lower my strength against saying no to other stuff.


That's me too, Robert. Hell, before I ever picked up that drink after 4 years in recovery, my addict was already driving the bus in my head.

Alcohol was always a gateway drug for me. Get me liquored up enough and it was screw it, anything goes.

I have no doubt had the circumstances been right when I relapsed, I would have been right back to the meth too. My higher power was definitely watching out over my sorry addict arse.

It still gives me goosebumps to think about it, and I thank God I made it back alive.