Robby,
I tend to stay out of the drama but I have replied to several of your posts. I was so hoping this treatment facility could give you the tools you need to work with. I totally agree with SFJ and Ian, to an extent. I believe you are putting all your eggs in one basket; believing treatment is going to be a magical pill that will take your pain away. It seems as though you have surrendered to your life-style of addiction. You express fears of "what if" I am nothing without drugs or alcohol? What if you ARE something when you get clean? Does your imagination ever go in that direction? This is not a response to ridicule you or make you feel bad. As SFJ stated, "it costs us nothing if you fail but it costs you alot." I hope you can find a way to truly SURRENDER and make a plan, before and after rehab. Your life is only doomed if you allow it to be so. Good luck!

Kathy as Cmom