That is so good to read, Ron!
I know that during my first year clean, I must have gained ,like 50 pounds.
Then during the next year, I lost about 30, without even realizing it.
Please don't feel too badly about your feelings....
They are to be expected.
We ex~users know that in time, we will have earned your trust .
The first year is still shaky ground...
Gets steadier with each passing day....