Goodmom, we tend to forget that we once did well with encouragement rather than 'helping'...first our kids roll over, we don't roll them...then they learn to crawl, they do that fine on their own (and things are still pretty safe most of the time), then we let them fall when they stand, they keep getting back up...they fall again when they start letting go and walking free...we let them. Suddenly they've learned to run, falls still occur, skinned knees and elbows, iodine and a bandaid, one day they've learned to dance...one step forward and two steps back...at some point we start seeing only those two steps back and want to step in and dance for them...we forgot that after the two steps back, the dance turns and it's one step back and two steps forward.

We also tend to forget that our children become adults, some might be more capable than others, some have more problems than others...yet they are still adults and as adults we can expect some quid pro quo.

Instead of 'jumping in', a favor, with one expected in return.