My husband and I get along and do not fight like we did. We haven't gotten along this well, since before the kids, if ever. Before, no matter how hard I tried, it felt like he expected more. Work more hours, bring in more money, keep this house clean, take care of everything more, try harder, no matter if you think you are trying as hard as you can, you can give more, and take less. You need to work TWO full time jobs, you are SUCH a failure, a disappointment....now that you are working so much, the house is falling to #@#+. Clean it more. Cook more. The lawn looks like hell. The garden is overgrown. The car is dirty. Stop trying to sleep and take care of these things! You look a mess. Now, you are always at work, or cleaning, and the kids and I feel neglected. You're an awful wife.

He refuses to believe it was so bad, now.....that he could have cared so little for me that he decided to go to the car races instead of picking me up after surgery.....or insisted I tape my bleeding incision up so I could continue working.....or the worst, when I was suicidal and went to stay at my friend's for the evening, because he left to play cards, and I was afraid I would kill myself if I was left alone....and when he got home he called to see where I was, and my friend's husband said, she is here, and in a bad way.....and he said, well, tell her she had better be to work in the morning.....and there's a pile of laundry.

He doesn't remember, and I'm even starting to forget. How did it get that bad?

Smiles, sounds like you are forgiven, accepted. They don't regard you as the same person who was so ill, from back then. I bet your neighbor would LOVE to help you arrange to speak, to others suffering, to show there is hope!