ehelp,

I'm sorry to hear this.

It troubles me that he blamed you at all for his relapse. That is not something anyone in recovery would abide him doing.

The reality is -- until he is honest with the people around him -- his sobriety will be very precarious.

Things like AA only work if you tell the truth. Otherwise, you only get 50 percent of what it has to offer.

But on your end, perhaps you can examine your own expectations.

If you don't live every moment thinking one more relapse will kill you, perhaps you will have some peace of mind. The reality is early recovery is a terrifying time. Period. There is no shortcut through it. So, if you can keep your eyes focused down the road, that may help.

And if you can't, then you both have to have a discussion about that too.