Crazy Girl - What your friend did was crazy.  He was not thinking straight.  Whether or not he wanted to take you out too, you will NEVER know.  Maybe he did, maybe he didn't.  I know you are trying to find a reasonable explanation for what he did, but no reasonable explanation exists.  Meth addicts normally kill out of anger.  Usually dumb anger, over something that would have seemed small had they not been so high.  Weaning myself off of meth worked for me, but I will be the first to admit that it will NOT work for 98% of the people.  Weaning means being able to control your use of meth.  Thats an oxymoron.  Meth controls us.  I was what they call a functional addict.  I never lost a job, and I never had any run ins with the law during my 27 years of use.  That is practically unheard of. The other bad thing was that I NEVER hit bottom.  I was always able to control it just enough to get by, which was a bad thing, as it kept me addicted for one half of my life.  I turned 54 a couple of days ago, and I used for 27 of those years.  What a waste of my life that was.  I agree that you are going through a lot right now.  Why don't you see if they have any meth meetings in your area, and just go to one to check it out.  I am happy to hear about your daughter, but SHE needs a role model.  Try to start the New Year clean.  Think of it as the first day of the rest of your life, and try to put all of this behind you.  Your friend, Carol