You have been through a lot recently. Most people WITHOUT drug problems would need some professional help. With you trying to quit ,and deal with the violent tragidy in your life, if you do not get help things are going to be miserable for you.
I totally disagree with whoever told you that weining yourself off dope is better then cold turkey.

My opinion on this is you need to stop following misguided advice and go see a professional to help you deal with the tremendous amount of things going on with you........ or, you can continue to do it on your own and feel the way you do right now.

Again, that's just my opinion