Day 11 . . . Today I'm not going to whine about cravings (they're still there) or cry about my family (I still don't like them much) or worry about New Years (it's still days away), instead, I'm going to tell you about a dream I had last night. A really weird one. I dreamed that it was Christmas all over again with my family and everyone there. Instead of having it where we normally have it, it was in a cave with a giant entrance, at least 10 stories high, and it was deep, it was in the middle of the mountains and there was big gravel on the ground like the gravel around railroad tracks. The first day everyone was there, I had fun, I went deep into the cave and I was having fun exploring it. The 2nd day, I realize how scary it is, how it could collapse at any moment and I won't go in there because I'm afraid I'm going to die in there. So I spend all day outside the cave while my family's inside I guess having fun. It should have been lonely, but it wasn't. It wasn't pleasant or anything, just there was really no negative emotion in this dream except for the fear of death, and even that felt safer than it feels when I'm awake. So it gets around night time and I have to use the bathroom, except the only bathroom is in the cave. So I go in the cave because I have to and I see the walls and the ceilings, much lower now, crumbling with dust spewing out of the cracks, but I make it to the bathroom. The bathroom is just like you'd expect a bathroom in a cave to be, lots of rocks, more gravel and stalls with buckets in them. So I ignore the buckets and just go against the wall. Still I'm in there forever, trying to get the last drop out, and finally someone comes in (it's a public bathroom) and then I pretend I'm done and go out. Then I wake up. Weird. Symbolic. Any ideas?