Abyss - I know you don't want to hear it, but everything he is saying is true.  My brain looks like swiss cheese now, never to be whole again.  Some damage is very permanent.  I believe that you have only been using for a short period of time.  You need to get away from it while you still can.  We are not saying this to scare you.  We are saying this to try to save you.  We care.  Your friend, Carol