Congratulations on Day 2.  Yes, I ate myself to death too for the first few months.  I too was never underweight, and that is why many of my friends and loved ones never suspected that I was a hard core meth addict.  Actually, I weigh less now then I did when I was a meth addict.  When I used meth I wouldn't eat all day, and then at night right before bed I would eat three or four meals, and then would go to sleep. Its nice to hear that you are trying to quit for your family.  Meth is such a vicious cycle.  I unlike you never ran out.  I always had at least a 1/4 ounce personal.  Having to count the days to your next pay day must really be a b!tch.  Thats like having to quit over and over again all of the time.  I would imagine that gets rather obnoxious after a while.  I think that I would just want to quit rather then have to count down the days until I could use again.  We all want acceptance.  Meth makes us feel better about ourselves, or at least thats what we convince ourselves of.  Actually, it really doesn't, we just tell ourselves that it does. Holidays are hard for the families of meth addicts, because we can rarely if ever be counted on for anything.  We show up to make an appearance, and then we can't wait to get out of there.  Nobody wins.  Its a lose/lose situation for every one involved. Just take it a day at a time.  Maybe we can convince you that staying clean is a much better way of life.  I have never heard of a happy meth addict, and I have known a lot of them over the years.  It has taken me 8 years of being clean to be able to say that I am really enjoying life again.  The part I like the most is not having all of the ups and downs every day.  My personality is now the same at 8am, as it is at 2pm, or 10pm.  I never used to be able to make plans in advance because I never knew how I would be feeling the next day, or the day after that.  I enjoy knowing that I can plan things now in advance, and know that I will be fine no matter what day it is.  Quitting because you ran out of money, is very different from quitting because you REALLY want to quit.  I will be your friend as long as I see that you are making a real effort to quit.  If I get the feeling that you are only coming here when you are out of money, and want someone to feel sorry for you, then I won't be here for you so much.  I don't mind spending my time helping someone to get clean, but I have better things to do to then waste my time on someone who plans on using again as soon as they can afford to.  I don't want to sound mean, but if you don't really want help, then there really isn't much that I or anyone else can do for you.  I am still trying to figure out why so few of the old people are around.  Maybe its because they got the feeling that the people left here didn't really want the help, and felt as if they were just wasting their time.  Only time will tell.  Your friend, Carol