seahorse wrote:
Because when the person who you know and love turns into a stranger, it is the most confusing and difficult thing to deal with. The only thing worse is when they look at you with a blank look on their face when you tell them this....


When I was on the roller coaster from hell, in my mind's eye I was the same person as I'd always been.  I didn't have a clue what others were seeing when they looked at or observed me.  I didn't see that my life was going down the toilet. 

Afterall, I was still working in a professional capacity, taking classes at night in preparation for law school, making dinner for my family, making sure my kids were doing their schoolwork, remaining faithful to my husband, paying the mortgage and other bills......blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

The truth is, I was dying and my world was falling apart around me, but I didn't see it.

It was only after I had about 60 days clean and sober when I realized that I had become a drug addicted wretch of a human being whose life had turned completely upside down, and it hit me like a lead balloon.  I couldn't believe it.  I honestly had no idea, and when I look back on it, I still can't believe how oblivious I was to what was really happening.

This might explain that "blank look on their face".


Last Edited By: nineyearsclean Dec 8 10 9:13 AM. Edited 2 times.