Thanks Jokersgirl - I understand that you are struggling and are trying to help and I thank you for that .. My wife has tried to help me but the obsession is so strong that I cannot listen to reason .. The addiction and obsession is in control ... I trust you understand being unable to be strong.

Laura - I Robby am willing to listen to directions and suggestions .. but WHY DON'T YOU OR ANYONE UNDERSTAND THAT ROBBY IS NOT IN CONTROL, DO U HEAR THAT .. I AM NOT IN CONTROL .. MY BPD IS AND MY ADDICTION IS ... and that is why I am UNABLE to listen to these suggestions .. I am scared to die but my impulsive thoughts and actions run my life ... I want to do the right thing but I have an unrelenting obsession to use and medicate my feelings .. WHY DON'T U GET THAT ... WHY DON'T U UNDERSTAND ... WHY DON'T U UNDERSTAND ... WHY DOESN'T ANYONE UNDERSTAND ME OR WHAT I AM GOING THROUGH ???????????????????????????????????????


SO, IT'S JUST BLAME ROBBY GAME HUH ? ROBBY WANTS TO GET HIGH, ROBBY IS DUMB, ETC, ETC , ETC .... NOBODY GETS THAT I AM TRYING TO CLIMB OUT OF THIS BUT I AM STUCK ...

Lisa - The medical community says that BPD needs LONG TERM treatment and that BPD and substance abuse goes hand and hand and relapse is common with BPD .. yes, I am on meds but need therapy which I am on a waiting list for ...


So, all I can do is try to stay clean and if I cannot then I have to invoke HARM REDUCTION ...