Robinr....

I walked away from my addict daughter many times with no hug.
What about the 1,000's of times you did hug her? Those count too you know.

I live far away from my family.
I've actually gone home to visit and not let her know I was in town.

I've gone home....went to see her....left after a string of mutual F-you's and got on a plane.
Those were the worst of times...when she was full on in her active addiction.

don't beat yourself up over it. It happens. This is emotional stuff we deal with!

I finally had to tell my daughter she was not welcome at family functions anymore.
It wasn't all that difficult....we just didn't tell her the plans....changed the usual venue....that sort of thing.

Too stressful for grandma and grandpa....and everyone else doesn't like walking on eggshells.

My parents and siblings went right along with it...because they were sick of her ruining every get together with her
BS.