Ive been wondering why?
If meth has been the issue in a persons life/relationship, then why does the relationship ( as in marriage) still hit the skids after the addict gets clean.
I read an article on the weekend about two time world surfing champion Tom Carrol, who after a debilitating stint on meth has been clean for 7 years. After he got clean, he moved on and so to did his wife. His wife said, when he was using he was never home and when he got clean he was never home because he was at 12 step meeting 4 nights a week. She said that she still loved Tom but wondered how much of their previous marriage was built on the drugs and not actually love. She wondered whether their marriage was a fraud built on meth.
I noticed three seperate posters here in the last four days all say they got clean and pretty much started all over again- new life=new wife/husband etc etc
What is it in the dynamics of a reltionship that changes once the addict gets clean that sometimes makes the loved one or user move on from relationships. Because, you often hear people say, I just want my old husband back.
Is it because the co-dependent can no longer be co dependent?
Is it because the enabler can no longer enable?
Is it because the wounds are just too deep?
Is it because the relationship was never ever going to work with meth or without meth?